I’m not sure how I feel tonight

I can honestly say that this is the first time since I’ve taught here that I’ve watched a senior class leave and not felt even a twinge of sadness. There are a few kids who I will miss desperately: Katie, who likes to play Judgey McJudgerson with me; Grant, who is the Perez Hilton of FRHS; Joel, who reminds me so much of myself at 17 that it’s frightening; Taylor, whose beautiful smile makes *me* smile; Gabs, who would give every part of herself for another human being; Brad, who when he learns to play the game will be unstoppable; Drew, my sweet sweet boy, Drew; Ryan, who I had in three classes this year and he still made me laugh daily; Amy, who is beautiful inside AND out…and there are more.

I recognize that maybe I’m just getting old. I find myself saying shit like, “When I was in high school…” I was going 89 different directions this year and didn’t have time to truly cultivate strong relationships with most of them. Part of the responsibility does lie in my court. However, as a whole, this class has been a challenge. In reality, they weren’t different than any other group of horny teenagers. In their reality, though, they were special. I’ve never taught a group more selfish, more self-entitled, more annoying, more self-righteous students. It was so bad that I’m not even teaching seniors next year – they turned me off that much. If I had another class like this one, I would want to quit altogether. So, instead I will work with AP seniors – the ones who love school, and the Student Council seniors – the ones who I already love. Oh, and I will teach freshmen – 68 of them. Say a prayer now – I’m not sure if it should be for me or for them, but I will keep you posted.

Yes, this is cheating. This is making my life easy. I don’t care. I deserve it. I wish them well, the class of 2009. I hope they figure it the fuck out. Peace out, homies.


1 Comment

  1. You do deserve it! I’m liking this trend of simplifying and reassessing your priorities. Could you talk to my husband???

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